Although the doors were shut

John 20: 24-31, NT page 115 But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.” A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name. Sermon My 3rd grade teacher wanted her class to understand the ongoing national presidential election, so one at a time we all went into a section of the library curtained off as a voting booth to choose between the two presidential candidates. Neither name meant too much to me, but one thing I did know even as a third grader – that growing up in Georgia it would be better for my reputation not to have anyone calling me a democrat. A few years later I was over at a friend’s house, and, for whatever reason, I was worried about being called picky. My friend’s mother asked me if I’d like a tomato sandwich for lunch – I told her that I would love one. Then she asked me if I had ever had a tomato sandwich before, and I had not, but because I didn’t want to be called picky, I told her I was sure I’d love it, though I didn’t. There are many other occasions where I have been less than honest to avoid being called something that I didn’t want to be called. I’ve kept my mouth shut during innumerable political conversations, walked away during immigration debates, pretended that I had voted when I had not, and stared intently at my plate during a dinner party hoping not to be asked directly any number of questions for fear that what happened to Thomas would happen to me. He has been known as Doubting Thomas for generations, while Peter, who denies Christ three times is never called Denying Peter, mirroring the habits of our society – where, perhaps ironically, we punish those who speak out rather than those who hide what they are really thinking and feeling. It’s not supposed to be that way. In fact we’ve been told that it isn’t. Our teachers tell us that there aren’t any dumb questions – but speak out in class and expose our confusion – who would do that? In class it feels more comfortable to hide ignorance or deny it. Mr. Rogers claims that he likes you just the way you are, but if I were you, I wouldn’t go assuming that everybody will. Often it is better to keep your more controversial opinions to yourself. And open up about your doubts - I wouldn't go doing that just anywhere. A friend once told me a story about his experience joining the Roman Catholic Church. He was engaged to a beautiful Roman Catholic woman, and part of the deal was that he would have to give up being Presbyterian so they could have a proper Roman Catholic wedding. Classes were required, so that this friend of mine might learn what to believe about heaven, creation, angels, Mary, various saints, and certainly the Pope. One day he raised his hand during class and asked, “Just how much of this stuff do I really have to believe?” “Well, all of it,” his teacher replied. Doubt isn’t welcomed everywhere, you see. Surely the disciples weren’t accepting and affirming of Thomas when he opened his big mouth and confessed to them his doubt. More likely they just wanted him to believe, and if he couldn’t believe, maybe he would at least keep his doubts to himself, especially when Jesus was around. That sounds like what would have happened in my family. My grandmother was a nurse, so she saw what could happen to people who rode skate boards or went white water rafting. Both of these things we were allowed to do – we just weren’t allowed to talk about it or do it when my grandmother was around. It’s interesting then to see what happens when Jesus comes and speaks with Thomas. Jesus knows the truth about him somehow, and while I can imagine that Thomas would be rejected for his inability to trust his friends or that he would be lectured for his skepticism – for not just believing something he might never be able to know for sure – instead Christ enters the room and says to him, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas then speaks what is known as the strongest statement of faith recorded in the Gospels: “My Lord and my God.” There is an important lesson here for me and for any of you who keep silent for fear of being labeled or criticized – when Thomas is honest about what stands in the way of his faithfulness – when he is honest about his doubt, Christ gives him exactly what he needs to believe. We are often so different – choosing instead to hide or deny – to pretend that we do believe when we don’t, to understand when we still have questions, to act like we are just fine when we aren’t. We hide from Christ as the disciples were hiding. For the disciples who were present to see Christ the first time he came in our first scripture lesson, though the door was locked and the disciples were hiding behind it, Christ walked right in to get to them. But we are so bold to believe that our door is too thick, that our doubts too deep, that our questions too profound. What Thomas does that seems nearly impossible, is that he gives words to that thing that like a locked door seems to stand in the way of his faith. That makes him different from the one who stays out of church, but can’t tell you why, as though this one’s reluctance were too great a thing for Christ to handle. That makes him different from the one who is angry with God but doesn’t want to be, so rather than give voice to the unfairness of his brother’s early death or his wife’s debilitating cancer and God’s inability to do anything about it, this one ignores the anger as though God were too fragile to take it. And certainly that makes Thomas different from the one who questions in her heart but puts on a face of determined faithfulness; the one who is physically present in the sanctuary but whose soul longs with deep, unanswered questions, the one who goes through the motions while Christ stands before you saying, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. I can take it.” Too often Christians are guilty of ignoring the realities of life – glossing over the big questions, silencing the doubters rather than hearing what they have to say – but remember that it is the church who calls him Doubting Thomas – not Christ. And in Thomas you can see that true faith comes through giving voice to your doubts, allowing God to hear your questions, see your fear or your anger – giving God the chance to know you for who you are and not who you pretend to be. Thomas speaks – and when he does he names the thing that stands in the way of his faith – and when you have do – do not be surprised that like him you will see and believe. Amen.